I'm a Porsche 911! 
Wednesday, January 25, 2006, 10:53 AM - blogFoo

You have a classic style, but you're up-to-date with the latest technology. You're ambitious, competitive, and you love to win. Performance, precision, and prestige - you're one of the elite, and you know it.
I knew that the first moment I saw one...

Test here.

UPDATE: the fooMistress is a Ferreri:

You are a Ferrari 360 Modena!


You've got it all. Power, passion, precision, and style. You're sensuous, exotic, and temperamental. Sure, you're expensive and high-maintenance, but you're worth it.


Yep, she's worth it.

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Best Blonde Joke Ever 
Monday, January 16, 2006, 11:46 AM - blogFoo
This had me laughing out loud.

UPDATE: Link is broken so don't follow it.
The joke was an endless series of links, all saying "Best blonde joke ever"
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Worst analogies ever written in a high school essay 
Tuesday, December 13, 2005, 11:21 AM - blogFoo
Deliciously bad...


· He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
Joseph Romm, Washington

· She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged the door open again.
Rich Murphy, Fairfax Station

· The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
Russell Beland, Springfield

· McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup.
Paul Sabourin, Silver Spring

· From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and "Jeopardy" comes on at 7 p.m. instead of 7:30.
Roy Ashley, Washington

· Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
Chuck Smith, Woodbridge

· Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.
Russell Beland, Springfield

· Bob was as perplexed as a hacker who means to access T:flw.quid55328.com\aaakk/ch@ung but gets T:\flw.quidaaakk/ch@ung by mistake
Ken Krattenmaker, Landover Hills

· Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
Unknown

· He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
Jack Bross, Chevy Chase

· The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
Gary F. Hevel, Silver Spring

· Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie this guy would be buried in the credits as something like "Second Tall Man."
Russell Beland, Springfield

· Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
Jennifer Hart, Arlington

· The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr Pepper can.
Wayne Goode, Madison, Ala.

· They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth
Paul Kocak, Syracuse, N.Y.

· John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
Russell Beland, Springfield

· The thunder was ominous-sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play.
Barbara Fetherolf, Alexandria

· His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free
Chuck Smith, Woodbridge

· The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon.
Unknown


Hat Tip OXymoron via Michaele Malkin


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Migrating to Simple PHP 
Friday, December 2, 2005, 04:46 PM - blogFoo
Archive data to follow.
UPDATED: Switch over is complete. Archive availiable for this year only; I'll be adding the rest later. I wanted to switch to this as I have decided to orphan the blogFoo software I was writing. Simple PHP Blog uses flat text files for the data source, and serves pages much faster.

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Tate's First Law of Traffic 
Monday, October 31, 2005, 12:30 PM - blogFoo
Tate's First Law: The person who pulls into light traffic, disregarding the rate of travel of the existing vehicles, will turn almost immediately.
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NewsBusters 
Thursday, October 6, 2005, 12:30 PM - blogFoo
Wasn't sure whether to add them as a blog or a comic....
UPDATED: NewsBusters is a Blog, Gaggle is the comic.
NewsBusters
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Cartoon Section 
Monday, October 3, 2005, 12:30 PM - blogFoo
Day By Day - Chris Muir
<!-- add the following lines to your website to get the most current cartoon from www.daybydaycartoon.com -->
<script language="JavaScript" src="http://www.daybydaycartoon.com/scripts/daybyday.js"></script>
<a href="http://www.daybydaycartoon.com"><img src="http://www.daybydaycartoon.com/images/sp.gif" height="200" width="575" id="dayByDay" name="dayByDay" border="0">
<script language="javascript">MM_changeProp('dayByDay','','src',parseUrl(),'IMG');</script>
<br><img src="http://www.daybydaycartoon.com/images/sp.gif" border="0" height="1" width="20">Day By Day© by Chris Muir.</a><BR>
<!-- Code copyright 2004 by Day By Day©; any redistribution, resale, or reuse without permission of the owner is forbidden -->
<!-- end Day By Day©; code-->
Gaggle - Greg Sheffield
<script src="http://newsbusters.org/gaggle/daily.js" language="javascript"></script>
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Ending slavery 
Tuesday, February 8, 2005, 12:30 PM - blogFoo
Next time someone refers to Imperialist America, I'll be sure to thank them for the compliment.

Nothing could be more jolting and discordant with the vision of today's intellectuals than the fact that it was businessmen, devout religious leaders and Western imperialists who together destroyed slavery around the world. And if it doesn't fit their vision, it is the same to them as if it never happened.

As anti-slavery ideas eventually spread throughout Western civilization, a worldwide struggle pitted the West against Africans, Arabs, Asians and virtually the entire non-Western world, which still saw nothing wrong with slavery. But Western imperialists had gunpowder weapons first and that enabled the West to stamp out slavery in other societies as well as in its own.

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